No Snowmobiles Allowed

A sense of humor is vital to one's own being. Granted, an individual, or even groups of individuals can exist without an ability to catch a chuckle or four, but the days are dreary and gray - one could even say that it would be similar to living in Siberia or being with a tribe of Investment Bankers. Twilight surrounds you without a glimmer of those brief shining moments. Thank Goodness I am spending my winter in the vortex of gleeful manifestations - St. John's.

For those of you who decided to take a snooze during your elementary school geography lessons (I was seated behind Richard Castageno who had a fabulous sense of humor and let it develop by driving the nuns wild all day long - I was lucky I knew how to spell my name by the eighth grade), let me provide you with a brief synopsis of The Virgin Islands. Millions of years ago, land shot up from the ocean floor creating wonderful water displays that resulted in mountains cascading directly to the sea. The vertical pitch of the Virgin Islands in more than 1,000 ft in zero to three seconds. Readers, that is quite a drop. Four wheel drives are mandatory and the road engineers test your skill by creating hairpin turns at the steepest locations. Party On!

So, every day is test of your driving and dodging ability. My cousins are terrific at dancing with the trucks, tourists and taxis as this trio attempts to make you sweat and ruin your Caneel Bay manicure. A toot on the horn lets you know they are rounding the bend; please sharpen your reflexes - perhaps an investigation of the surrounding foliage as you careen into the side jungle is in your future. So far, so good - I haven't investigated the roots of the banana tree but every day is a new adventure. One of my future goals is to be closer to nature - this may be my chance.

But, wait, the roads were constructed to provide drivers with comic relief. Truly, St. John's traffic department wants to lighten your day. On the street to Jerry and Tish's house is an official sign indicating No Snowmobiles Allowed. No kidding, it is an authorized 8 x 10 white metal glossy warning drivers not to wander the streets as if in the tundra. While they may be lurking in the rainforest, no worries about frozen mobilers lurching into the stream of jeeps and semis.

How reassuring that snowmobiles will not be crowding the paved mountain passes. It is even better to realize the traffic department is giggling while instructing us to lighten up and enjoy the day.